Digg’s ToeCracker Has Real ‘BOMB ON BOARD’ Threat to Plane

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After a full scale bomb threat to my plane and lost luggage . . . be warned as you will get a vision which may scare some of you and excite others.

I sit here, without a stitch of clothing on as the only clothes I now have, a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and my socks . . . needed to be washed after wearing them for close to 4 days.

Yep, I have no clothes other than the ones I had on my back and my hairy ass.

I suppose I could hold a Nude Bomb Sale so I don’t scare the neighbors.

Let me recap on what was an interesting 24 hours last Friday to Saturday.

On Friday, After downing too many free beers and food in the airport lounge, I boarded my
flight from the US to Ireland, nothing wrong so far.

About 4 hours from landing, a lady in my row collapsed to the floor. Luckily her husband
was a surgeon and new what to do, the poor lady wasn’t well and when she was stable, was laying down with her head next to me with her husband at the other end, taking care of her.

About the time we were due to descend, the pilot said due to severe winds, our plane would have to circle for a while until given the all clear to land.

Now, I have flown a lot and I smelt bullshit.

I mean this was Ireland not a bloody hurricane in Florida.

After 70 minutes of circling the sky like a bloody vulture looking for prey, we landed and the
connection for my next flight was looking bleak, especially with a badly sprained left foot which
by now was as swollen as a football.

Almost as soon as the plane came to a stop and we started to taxi off the runway, we came to an
abrupt halt so I looked out the window and saw more cop cars and fire engines than you could imagine. I knew something wasn’t right.

Within a few minutes, the door was opened and a swarm of police entered the plane.

Now 9/11 anniversary was less than a week away so you didn’t need to be Einstein to work out
WTF was going on.

We were then informed there had been a serious threat to our plane and all passengers would
be escorted off the plane, interviewed etc.

Bad winds – Bullshit!

The only bad wind was now coming out of the asses of 300 nervous passengers who were still trying to wake up after a long flight and get their heads around the bomb threat.

After being taken to a secure area for questioning, which luckily for me, I was near the front of the long line up of people, I got to the garda (police) officer.

He explained a note had been left in the toilet with ‘BOMB ON BOARD’ which although was most likely someone’s idea of a sick joke, the airline had to take it seriously.

I thought to myself, no shit Sherlock.

He asked me my surname and I said ‘Crook’.

Well he let out a huge laugh, got my passport details and asked me for a handwriting sample
and I had to write 3 times with each hand, in capitals – BOMB ON BOARD and then after a
while I was allowed to leave and try and hobble to make my plane.

I gave myself stuff all chance of doing so, considering my flight was due to leave in 20 minutes, I still had to clear immigration, go through yet another security check and thegate says it was at least a 10 minute walk after I cleared the checkpoint.

I managed to make it, was told my luggage did as well and then when I arrived at my final
destination, no luggage.

It’s now Tuesday, my bags seem to be in orbit as no bastard can find them and trying to get
hold of the insurance claims section is much harder than you could ever imagine.

So, as I sit here, stark naked, waiting for my jeans and t-shirt to dry, I need to hold
a Nude Bomb Sale so I don’t scare my friends and the neighbors.

I estimate the contents of my luggage to be at least 5 grand and the hope of getting this from a claim is about zero. I‘ve got more chance of scoring with Pamela Anderson.I sent a ‘Nude Bomb Sale’ offer to my list and said . . . go on and get it unless you want me to make a webcam video in the nude and post it to youtube.

“Dedicated to kicking your ass until you succeed and now trying to cover mine with clothing.”Warmly

Trevor ‘ToeCracker’ Crook
PS. This isn’t a joke, this happened and it’s been a stressful few days.’

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2 Responses to Digg’s ToeCracker Has Real ‘BOMB ON BOARD’ Threat to Plane

  • Joseph says:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA – oh god that’s hilarious – how the hell did you get 5k worth of clothes in a suitcase you baron you!

  • Zookeglilkick says:

    Nothing seems to be easier than seeing someone whom you can help but not helping.
    I suggest we start giving it a try. Give love to the ones that need it.
    God will appreciate it.

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